Old Joke - If Windoze was a car.

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Greg_Cornish
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Old Joke - If Windoze was a car.

Post by Greg_Cornish »

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating: If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five per cent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light.

7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.
"The trouble with quotes on the Internet, is that you can never know if they are genuine." - Abraham Lincoln
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drrakruz
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Re: Old Joke - If Windoze was a car.

Post by drrakruz »

Greg_Cornish wrote:5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five per cent of the roads.
At least you would be able to enjoy theatre quality audio and video systems on your travels! You would also have the best graphics on your vehicle as well!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:
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ash
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Re: Old Joke - If Windoze was a car.

Post by ash »

Q: What is the difference between a Mac User and a Terrorist?
A: You can negotiate with a terrorist.




Q: What do Mac Users use for birth control?
A: Their personalities!
Greg_Cornish
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Re: Old Joke - If Windoze was a car.

Post by Greg_Cornish »

What's the difference between a PC user and a Lemming?

Nothing.

I made that one up.
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drrakruz
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Re: Old Joke - If Windoze was a car.

Post by drrakruz »

ash wrote:Q: What is the difference between a Mac User and a Terrorist?
A: You can negotiate with a terrorist.

Q: What do Mac Users use for birth control?
A: Their personalities!
What do air conditioning and PC's have in common?

When you open the windows, neither works. :wink:
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Andy Lippert
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Re: Old Joke - If Windoze was a car.

Post by Andy Lippert »

MACs suck.



Andy
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drrakruz
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Re: Old Joke - If Windoze was a car.

Post by drrakruz »

Andy Lippert wrote:MACs suck.
Andy
PC = Piece of Crap
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Andy Lippert
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Re: Old Joke - If Windoze was a car.

Post by Andy Lippert »

and MAC stands for

"Moronic Arrogant Communist. :lol:


Andy


P.S. MAC's SUCK!
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drrakruz
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Re: Old Joke - If Windoze was a car.

Post by drrakruz »

Andy Lippert wrote:and MAC stands for

"Moronic Arrogant Communist. :lol:


Andy


P.S. MAC's SUCK!

Andy, Andy, Andy, When are you going to learn? Oops, my bad, PC's aren't intuitive like a MAC.

Here's one for you:

A sexual
N ecrafeliac
D !ck
Y anker

P. S. Get a MAC!!! :wink: :shock: :lol: :lol: :lol:
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