Fishing vs Family Tough choice? You decide!

[Gumpa]

Untill 3 yrs ago my son-in law and I fished regularly in the 100 % team circut "Central Valley" and ABA as well but as alot of you all know over time, things change. My oldest grandson plays Little Leauge Baseball and leauge starts in early April. Ok, no conflict there because all the games are during the week. Leauge is over in late May, no problem. Well, since AJ, (My Grandson) turned 8 he has made the All Stars every year and is now 11. You ask, are you going to bragg a little? Yes Indeed! Truns out that All Star games are on the weekends so no more fishing event's, no problem don't wan't to miss anything.

My son in law and I decided to fish the BBBC weekend before last missing an All Star tournement in Fresno. On Sat around 1pm my phone rings and it's my Daughter telling us that AJ had just hit one out of the park. That was his first Home Run of the season and his Dad and Gumpa are sitting in a boat up on the Delta and missed it. Dang!!! We looked at each other as if to say, without saying, what are we doing here?

You know priorities change over time and we both love to fish but when it comes to kids they are truly at the top of the list. We could have forgone another baseball tournement this past weekend and fished another event but I'm glad we didn't.

AJ Pease. Remember that name fellas. Not cause he's my grandson but this kid can playball!!! This past weekend playing in the Kingsburg tournement he had 9 hits in 11 at bats. 2 home runs 1 triple 4 doubles 2 singles and 8 rbi's That to me was like landing a hog. Being at the games and watching it all unfold. So for now we will fish when we can, (mostly at night) and leave the weekends to the Boy's cause you never know what your gonna miss.. Yes, the 1 weekend we decided to fish we missed a family event. I assure you it won't happen again. So, when were slinging lines at night during the summer you can bet AJ and his little brother are gonna be right there with us slinging lines as well.......



When the day is done and there's no more sun, do we know in our heart's we have tried our best to do what's right in there eye's? if we have they will see and understand, the good thing's of this world and not the bad. And come to us and say, Thank you Dad for being there for me........



In Loving Memory of MY DAD.... Ace Work Jr.

Happy Father's Day to all....... Tom aka Gumpa

[N.A.R]

Tough choice? NO WAY! I quit fishing 95% of the time to watch and coach my son play baseball and football. For 6 years I was either dragging the field or putting up cones, I wouldn't choose any body of water over that.

I was able to watch his team win the Pop Warner SuperBowl in Fl. But the second he hit High School his coaches made it real clear to back off....Thats when I jumped back in my boat.

[Caudawg]

That's a great post Gumpa! Sounds like your grandson is quite a slugger!

The dilemna of fishing vs family is gutwrenching. I made the decision to get out of tournament fishing back in the mid 90's for this very reason. I was trying to build a new business that would support my family in the years to come. I could not count on tournament winnings to pay the bills especially in those days.

This decision has haunted me because my life's dream has always been to be a touring pro. Watching my cohorts like Skeet Reese, Mike Reynolds, etc make it big on the tour just kills me because these were the guys I hung out with back in the day. (Don't get me wrong, I am extremely happy for these guys). I will always wonder if I could have hit the BIG TIME like these guys have...had I only stuck with it. I don't know why I torture myself with these thoughts but I guess its human nature.

The good news is I built a succesful wireless business (which I recently sold) and raised my family along the way. So I clearly did the right thing even though I am haunted by the thoughts of what might have been had I stuck with tournament fishing?

While this has been a dilemna...I'm sure most would agree that we all need to put our families first. You can't go wrong here.

[DeltaBound]

Family's first "ALWAYS" but you don't have to go to every game either. Have your daughter film the game and you and your grandson can watch it together. Problem solved.

[Old dog]

My kids missed so much because of my obsesion with fishing. I try to tell the young kids I fish with these days not to make the same mistakes I did. Luckily my 2 kids have turned out fine, but I am still trying to make up for the 100s of weekends I was gone when they were very young. My wife finally told me that our daughter would cry herself to sleep, because she missed me so much and was worried something would happen to me. You can never get that time back, but I am very fortunate that both my wife and kids have forgiven me for not being there when I should have been.

[GKramer]

I would second all these sentiments, with maybe this one addition. I have nine kids, and at the peak period in our lives, we had six playing soccer, which pretty much meant 12 practices and six to eight games a week in season; some out of town.

My wife always felt like she was not doing her job as a parent if she did not kill herself trying to make every practice and every game. I tried to attend what each of the kids deemed was a "big game" and in fact, I got to see everyone play--and frankly, way more practices than were probably necessary.

If I learned anything (and everyone's situation is a little different) it's that it's about quality of the time spent, not the quantity. If the kids know you're there for them in the moment (even if that moment is the evening recap instead of the "live broadcast") they will be fine. They may even look forward to that time when they get to spin the story their way to an adoring dad, mom or grandparent.

Anyway, I, for one, appreciate where your hearts are in this matter.

gk

www.kramergonefishing.com

[Bassgod]

As it has been said, family first! I coach my daughters softball 10 months out of the year. Rec ball followed by all stars, and then winter ball. With very careful planning, I still make about
20-25 tournaments a year, given I have to fish a night series and a local club to feed my competitive side, and everything is local. I have rented a car before to drive to El Cap from LA to fish a night tourney and be back the next morning before the next game, very brutal.
I have missed a few games due to having some great assistant coaches and each time I find myself worrying about the team more than my fishing, and both seem to suffer and I just feel like the worst dad/coach ever. When I miss games it was because I was in tight points races, and all I can do is not stretch myself so thin by doing both. A year and a half from now she will be in High school and that will help, but I have a 4 year old who will be starting up about that time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[big_gorilla]

I agree with most of what everybody said but remember this one thing.

NOTHING will compare to seeing the look on his face when he does something like hit one out of the park in person. No video or picture will make you as proud as being there to witness it.

I gave up a lot of my fishing for my daughter and all that she does knowing that I can always go fishing later but being there while they grow is PRICELESS.

Good Luck.

PS give your grandson a high five from all of us.

[KMAC]

When I think back of all the time I spent with my kids growing up, it's kind of divided into two groups...cheering them on at sporting events,school activities etc. and the time they spent with me fishing. It's all good ! All my kids can finese a worm for bass or toss a sardine to a tuna. Sharing your time, love and guidence is what counts. You don't have to quit fishing if you don't want to.

[Gumpa]

I agree with most of what everybody said but remember this one thing.

NOTHING will compare to seeing the look on his face when he does something like hit one out of the park in person. No video or picture will make you as proud as being there to witness it.

I gave up a lot of my fishing for my daughter and all that she does knowing that I can always go fishing later but being there while they grow is PRICELESS.

Good Luck.

PS give your grandson a high five from all of us.

Thanks big_gorilla I have to agree. NOTHING compares to seeing the look on his face when he hits 1 out of the park or lands a big 1. Thoses moments are priceless!! I do agree with alot of other comment's posted. Sometimes you just can't make them all but you do your best. Thank you all for your input. Very inlighting. And by the way, I'll be sure and high 5 him for you all. Cheer's! Gumpa

[N.A.R]

NOTHING will compare to seeing the look on his face when he does something like hit one out of the park in person.

LoL or watching the next at bat when he swung so hard he darn near fell down and he struck out....LoL! Remember that like it was yesterday......

[Kevin Evans - Kap]

Great post...
Family first and fishing will always be there...IMHO.

Kap

[Jerry Fournier]

Jay Yelas one of the best tournament bass fisherman in the history of the sport wrote a book called "Faith, Family and Fishing" he puts it all on the line. It is a great book to read especially if you have a problem wondering if you should be fishing or being with family.
I just finished up coaching my sons baseball season and my daughters swim season. It has been a struggle to manage my fishing with my family. But without a doubt the kids always come first...if my team partner or any of the other guys think I am nuts to be with my family....then I am hanging with the wrong company.

Thank you for bringing up this subject as many bass guys mess up their family lives over these green things that we like to catch. Those green things will always be there...but watching my son hit nine home runs this past year is now family history and I got to witness it.

God Bless all the Grand Dads, Dads and soon to be dads, Keep doing the right thing and be with your family.

[miklanderson]

I spent a lot of time fishing when my daughter was younger but now that she's getting a little older and playing sports, I haven't been fishing in 5 months. She's playing AAU basketball and softball right now so my weekends are spent running from game to game. The way I see it, I'll have plenty of time to fish once the kids are grown up. Right now, I'm going to invest as much time into them as possible. She fishes with me on occasion but not as much as she used to...

[TRUFISH]

Are u guys crazy? What is all this talk about family vs. fishing? Maybe this is why u guys don't do well in tournaments. You can always record sports activities and watch them later. You don't have to be there when they break an arm or a leg or have to be rushed to the ER because they got hit in the head with a ball. Man, nothing is better than winning a tournament or just going fishing and drinking beer and falling off your boat being drunk. Fishing is the best and will always be.










p.s. i'm just bored and thought i would make a post. i'm just kidding. har har har.

[BassManDan]

Screw Family!!!!!!!

Family is always there bothering you, but do you ever get annoyed with bass, I bet not!

[scottsweet]

You know, this is a great topic! I have to say that in a figurative sense, I would give my right arm to have this problem! Folks, I don't have kids, though divorced, and have had nothing but bad luck on finding a good woman to have a family.

I am single and fish a lot, but only wish I had the kids to savor those precious moments. Further, so would my parents. You should be so grateful and I know that is a very "loaded" word in this context, but nevertheless, grateful you have that opportunity because some of us have never and probably will never have the joy that goes with this...

Enjoy them while you can because before you know it, they won't be around anymore.

Scott

[Terry]

I decided to skip my kid's receiving his black belt in Tang Soo Do and go to Havasu for an out of town club event. That Saturday as soon as we hit the water the wind howled, about 40. We fished briefly, decided to go back for raingear, speared a wave, got soaked. My partner says "This sucks. I could be watching my kid play ball." We looked at each other and put it on the trailer and set the land speed record back to SD. My kid's face absolutely shone when I walked thru the door as the ceremony started. Makes me cry thinking about it.

Absolutely priceless.

Terry

[crayfish]

To me the choice is not tough at all. Family first. My son is very involved in sports. We haul him and his team mates all over northern california for tournaments. Sometimes even out of state. I would never be able to reclaim missed family time. I only have a few more years with him, then he is off to college. So for now I only fish 1 tournament Series as a backseater. This is to ensure that I get to fish at all. I will have plently of time when he is out of the house to fish as often as I would like. Then I will buy new boat and jump into the front seat and take fishing a bit more seriously.

Ray

[basshunter4u]

Not to hurt too much but your kids will only be young once and they do grow fast. I made a promise to my son to be there for him untill he is old enough to take care of him self and has other intrests in life other than tooling around with his dad. This has made my fishing time suffer but there will always be enough time to fish but not enough time to father your 11 year old soon to be 18 in a blink of an eye. Reality BITES Happy fathers day guys.

Don O

[JKitz]

Family First in those situations hands down... Its only a few years out of your life that will give you a lifetime of memories. The Hog will always be there for you to catch, but family memories trump it every time!!

Now if there is some kind of Shower (co-ed or not).. Its Fishing 100%!!

[aNNieNsaLTIE]

Well, I just became a DAD finally June 11th. I am one excited person. Her name is Sophia Hailey Ng.

Every time I pick her up i have no control over singing her the ABC's to stop her crying, give her a kiss because i miss her already, One last sniff, I love the way she smells. Corny? Sorry guys!

I picked up my boat the other day, got some GOODZ installed and electricals freshen up. Told the wife, "BOATS READY, going to take it out for a test run................" That line did not work. owells did not feel bad at all, got over it quick. it's still in the back of my mind though.

BUT.. The day she brings home her little Boyfriend and tries to introduce him to me................ I sure do not know how to handle that.

Do I lay the 357 mag. on my lap w/ the 12 gauge standing tall next to me. then start standing up all my 12 gauge slugs on the coffee table?

I think I better start adding to my nightly prayers that I hope she meets a guy like me!

O WAIT.. FAMILY OVER FISHING... FAMILY, I SAY, THATS WHY I HAVE NOT OR WILL NOT SELL MY OTHER BOAT! ISN'T FAMILY THE REASON WHY WE HAVE SO MUCH GEAR?

Steven[ [/b]

[Bassinlee]

It's a no-brainer guys. Family. I've got five, oldest 25, youngest 9. It'd kill me not to experience the 'ordinary times' of growing up. My dad wasn't around-divorced when I was 10. But my fondest memories were when he took me far out on the muddy flats in the Bay when the tide was out to catch stripers. Occasionally, we'd get caught up in the slash and catch of a hot striper bite, and the tide would sneak up on us, and strand us out on a little island with a hundred yards of water between us and the shoreline. When you're a little kid, it looks 20 feet deep, and you're gonna drown trying to get back to the shoreline. More than once, he just hoisted me up on his shoulders, and magically walked back across the water to the shoreline. Only Gods can do that.
I didn't fish again for 17 years after he left my life.
I started up again when I was almost 30, and have been hooked ever since. But one of the reasons I don't fish tournaments, is because my kids have always been on the soccer field during the weekends. And I quickly learned that they do the most incredible, electrifying things on days when you, for some reason, can't be there. My daughters are kick-a$$ forces-of-nature on the soccer fields, and I swear, it's hard to be humble when you're walking around on the sidelines, popping the buttons off your shirt while other parents are yelling and screaming when MY KID saves the game. Or when your 23 year old walks across the stage to receive her Master's degree with honors. Or when your kid executes the most beautiful move in the history of ballet. Or when you read a post from another kid on a blog that makes you realize that she's got an astonishing gift as a writer. I have to believe that just being there for them makes them better. I definitely know that being there for the fish won't make me feel as heart-full.

-Bassinlee

[jsc11700]

My kids missed so much because of my obsesion with fishing. I try to tell the young kids I fish with these days not to make the same mistakes I did.

<------- ONE OF THOSE YOUNG KIDS. I was kinda surprised to see this thread on here. Ask anyone especially my wife and she will tell you I am as addcited to fishing as it gets. Not only fishing but competing and winning. My wife wants to start having kids and all I can think about is how my practice time or tournaments are going to get cut short. I am sure kids are worth it, but how the heck do you guys deal with not having that competitive outlet?

[Ron C]

A great topic indeed.

As I am writing this, I am sitting in a motel room in Anaheim. My 15-year old son and I are here enjoying a "Road Trip" by taking in all three Dodgers/Angels games at Angels Stadium (Go Dodgers!).

What does this have to do with the topic at hand? Well, this past week, I won two tournaments at Castaic Lake and there were two more this weekend which I probably would have done well in. However, our plans for this baseball weekend were made long before the tournament schedule came out and my decision to spend this irreplaceable time with my son over fishing was a no-brainer.

I sincerely feel sorry for those who always put fishing ahead of their families. Yes, I have missed several of my son's and daughter's activities because of tournaments (either running them or competing in them), but I have always tried to make it up to them in other ways - like an occasional Road Trip, etc.

To those who say "screw family" – you will sadly and painfully have to eat those words when you are laying on your death-bed with no one to care for you or to love you.

[DeltaBound]

A great topic indeed.

As I am writing this, I am sitting in a motel room in Anaheim. My 15-year old son and I are here enjoying a "Road Trip" by taking in all three Dodgers/Angels games at Angels Stadium (Go Dodgers!).

What does this have to do with the topic at hand? Well, this past week, I won two tournaments at Castaic Lake and there were two more this weekend which I probably would have done well in. However, our plans for this baseball weekend were made long before the tournament schedule came out and my decision to spend this irreplaceable time with my son over fishing was a no-brainer.

I sincerely feel sorry for those who always put fishing ahead of their families. Yes, I have missed several of my son's and daughter's activities because of tournaments (either running them or competing in them), but I have always tried to make it up to them in other ways - like an occasional Road Trip, etc.

To those who say "screw family" – you will sadly and painfully have to eat those words when you are laying on your death-bed with no one to care for you or to love you.

Hmmm. two tournaments on Castaic? Was Mike home with his kids playing catch?

[finebassfisher]

its your grandson. i feel you should find another fishing partner when your son in law is not at your grandsons games. You should split 50-50 on fishing and your grandsons baseball games. There are many more years to come in baseball and i feel his dad has a bigger priority to be there than you do and you should go fishing.

[neighbor]

I have been an avid viewer of WB.com for quite some time. This is the first subject that I have felt compelled to answear. I recently laid my son to rest after a 4 year battle with a Folicular Dendritic cell tumor, a very rare form of cancer. Grant played in an excess of 1000 baseball games from coast to coast. I was blessed to attend all but about 25 games and I am kicking myself hard because I missed those games. It takes a Village to raise a family, not just a mother and father. Grand parents are a very essential part and balance in raising a family. My parents were able to attend over 90% of Grants games. During Grants illness he only thought of others, and thanked God for the opportunity to pass on his knowledge and tutoring to the local youth and high school players during his treatments. Just days prior to his passing he chose to be transported to his church to speak with the local youth regarding faith and committment. Grant and I had a very special relationship. To have a conversation with one of your children regarding being scared and what type of service he wanted, where he wanted to be laid to rest and a to do list after his passing was the hardest task of my life. We live through his strength and his tribulations. Grant asked to be laid to rest with his Grandmother who had just recently past. As for the moral to this, a family that plays together stays together. You can always fish or hunt. I would like to think my partners in TNA, Dave Rush, Vince Hurtado and Jeff Chambers for thier Love and support during these tough times. As Grant always said"NEVER GIVE UP,FOR LOVE OF THE GAME" Family First