i was told i could not go fishing today!!

stickbait · Post by **stickbait** » Wed Sep 12, 2007 9:10 pm

aNNieNsaLTIE wrote:i told the WIFE, "I'm going out tomorrow" she says," no"..i can not get use to fishing once a month or once every other week. This is not me! I do not gamble, drink, smoke, or attend night clubs..what the hell! I just need my time.. what do you guys tell the wives?

saLTIE-

You need to fix this asap as you will not be happily married soon!You have recieved alot of good advise with this post.

I will bet that some of it is a "money issuse".. Your spending money for your enjoyment that she is not a part of.

My wife has never told me what I can do or have I told her, what she can do. We have had this understanding since we first met.

We communicate on whats happening everyday.. most of the time, it starts around wednesday, when she askes where ya going fishing this weekend?

One thing we do that helps us is, we take several small 2 to 4 day mini trips through out the year, sometimes with other couples other times just us.

No one should try to controll any relationship, marriage or friendships... period!

We kind of have our own special time alone with our own checking accounts and this helps our relationship big time.

We set it up my money, her money and house money!

seaya
stickbait

Rob Cummings · Post by **Rob Cummings** » Wed Sep 12, 2007 9:33 pm

Lance wrote:Either that or buy your wife a horse....you'll never see her

A boy horse or a girl horse?

Lance · Post by **Lance** » Wed Sep 12, 2007 9:47 pm

She has two males and they both have ummmmmm been "De-maled". Tracy said it because their easier to train

Seems that women try to do that in every aspect of life, horses....men

badbass25 · Post by **badbass25** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 5:32 am

SPEW !!! -- For the record............ Bernie Ward has never said on inteligable thing is his Life !!!!! (that is his closing line for his radio show...)

I don't have a clue who Bernie Ward is. He isn't the one who told me that, thats for sure. Doesn't sound like you like him very much.

ash · Post by **ash** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 6:01 am

Andy Giannini wrote: Sometimes you stay home, so you CAN fish.
.02 A.G.

You Said it Andy, as I man i know that I have responsabilities to my house, family and myslef. My family comes first and foremost, but I know that I am selfish and need that me time as well. So I plan out my weekends what I need to get done, make sure evrything is kosher around the house and never have a problem with scheduled tournament events or practice days.

Now, if I get a wild hair up my arse and want to just take off sat AM to get out I will ask Lynne if that is cool, sometimes she reminds me well we have these other commitments etc.... most of the times she surprises me and says yeah its cool just be home early so we can go out for dinner etc...

It's all in the approach and the communication, the more open the communication and the more your house is in order (not just the physical dwelling) the easier it is to gauge weather or not you should even go out fishing that day.

I would guess that there is a lot of "underlying issues" here that she is not communicating or that you are not telling us. Perhaps the best thing to do is to WANT to not go fishing this weekend, take your wife out, or pop a bottle of wine and check in with her in terms of what is going on in her head. (do this on Friday) In the afterglow of your ummm listening to her, dont be surprised if she says why dont you go ahead and go to the lake this weekend.

Thats just this guys point of view.

aNNieNsaLTIE · Post by **aNNieNsaLTIE** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 7:54 am

Marty,
you go this dialed down!!!

saLTIE-

aNNieNsaLTIE · Post by **aNNieNsaLTIE** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 8:10 am

o i forgot to mention i have never been to a nudey bar in my life...and never will attend!

saLTIE-

Fish Chris · Post by **Fish Chris** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 8:58 am

I used to be with a girl that tried that "once".

And ya' know what ? I didn't go fishing.

However, I threw such an outrageous $#!+ fit, that NEVER again, in our next 7 years living together, did she EVER try that again ! In other words, I made sure she would never forget her mistake.

You just gotta' nip that problem in the bud !

Any girl who hooks up with a guy named "Fish Chris" has got to know in the first 10 minutes......

1) I fish A LOT ! Preferably, by myself.

2) I do what I want, how I want, when I want.

3) There won't EVER be any kids.

4) There won't ever be much money.

Probably why I'm single..... but happily single.

Peace,
Fish

Greg_Cornish · Post by **Greg_Cornish** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 10:13 am

badbass25 wrote:I was told by an older wiser married man, that it always easier to ask for forgiveness, than it is to ask for permission.

Bernie Ward is a super intelligent liberal talk show radio host with a mind like a steel trap. He questions everything and causes you to think. Unfortunately he's so abrasive and so interested in creating controversy for ratings he goes over the top and I can't stand listening to him very long. He uses this line as a sign off signature to his show "God Talk" on KGO radio out of San Francisco..

troutnut · Post by **troutnut** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 11:28 am

possessed by Satan! Keep far away.

ssbassgirl · Post by **ssbassgirl** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 1:12 pm

Fish Chris wrote:I used to be with a girl that tried that "once".

And ya' know what ? I didn't go fishing.

However, I threw such an outrageous $#!+ fit, that NEVER again, in our next 7 years living together, did she EVER try that again ! In other words, I made sure she would never forget her mistake.

You just gotta' nip that problem in the bud !

Any girl who hooks up with a guy named "Fish Chris" has got to know in the first 10 minutes......

1) I fish A LOT ! Preferably, by myself.

2) I do what I want, how I want, when I want.

3) There won't EVER be any kids.

4) There won't ever be much money.

Probably why I'm single..... but happily single.

Peace,
Fish

probably why you're single???
It's good to know your happy.....ALONE
I can't believe how close minded this post is. I read a few others where i thought the thinking was a little off but this one takes the cake!

DeltaDan · Post by **DeltaDan** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 1:14 pm

Attaway to give them

in reality Super Sport !!

Terry Smith · Post by **Terry Smith** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 1:20 pm

ssbassgirl wrote: but this one takes the cake!

From the pictures he takes of himself he takes A WHOOOOLE BUNCH OF CAKES

Brian · Post by **Brian** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 1:26 pm

Fish Chris wrote:I used to be with a girl that tried that "once".

And ya' know what ? I didn't go fishing.

However, I threw such an outrageous $#!+ fit, that NEVER again, in our next 7 years living together, did she EVER try that again ! In other words, I made sure she would never forget her mistake.

You just gotta' nip that problem in the bud !

Any girl who hooks up with a guy named "Fish Chris" has got to know in the first 10 minutes......

1) I fish A LOT ! Preferably, by myself.

2) I do what I want, how I want, when I want.

3) There won't EVER be any kids.

4) There won't ever be much money.

Probably why I'm single..... but happily single.

Peace,
Fish

Now there is a man who is keeping it real. Best post in the thread yet

Terry Smith · Post by **Terry Smith** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 1:28 pm

Hey Brian want ot go fish after work?

Brian) Sorry I cant the wife saw my post on here and I'm grounded.

Brian · Post by **Brian** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 1:32 pm

Terry Smith wrote:Hey Brian want ot go fish after work?

Brian) Sorry I cant the wife saw my post on here and I'm grounded.

lol, Too bad you know me better than that, And you know it isnt true

Terry Smith · Post by **Terry Smith** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 1:34 pm

ssbassgirl · Post by **ssbassgirl** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 1:34 pm

Brian wrote: Now there is a man who is keeping it real. Best post in the thread yet

You would do anything to disagree with me wouldn't you Brian? Tell em what you really said...

Greg_Cornish · Post by **Greg_Cornish** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 1:47 pm

troutnut wrote:possessed by Satan! Keep far away.

LOL!

Greg_Cornish · Post by **Greg_Cornish** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 1:49 pm

ssbassgirl wrote:
Fish Chris wrote:I used to be with a girl that tried that "once".

And ya' know what ? I didn't go fishing.

However, I threw such an outrageous $#!+ fit, that NEVER again, in our next 7 years living together, did she EVER try that again ! In other words, I made sure she would never forget her mistake.

You just gotta' nip that problem in the bud !

Any girl who hooks up with a guy named "Fish Chris" has got to know in the first 10 minutes......

1) I fish A LOT ! Preferably, by myself.

2) I do what I want, how I want, when I want.

3) There won't EVER be any kids.

4) There won't ever be much money.

Probably why I'm single..... but happily single.

Peace,
Fish
probably why you're single???
It's good to know your happy.....ALONE
I can't believe how close minded this post is. I read a few others where i thought the thinking was a little off but this one takes the cake!

Close minded or honest?

ssbassgirl · Post by **ssbassgirl** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 2:07 pm

Greg_Cornish wrote:
Close minded or honest?

parts of it are brutally honest but when you use the words won't ever i would say that's close minded.

I mean 10 years ago I would never have imagined that today I would be some crazy lunatic bass fisherwoman yet here i am.
Never say Never or won't ever for a reason. As our lives change and evolve so do our attitudes and desires

g-man · Post by **g-man** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 2:11 pm

ssbassgirl wrote:
Greg_Cornish wrote:
Close minded or honest?
parts of it are brutally honest but when you use the words won't ever i would say that's close minded.

I mean 10 years ago I would never have imagined that today I would be some crazy lunatic bass fisherwoman yet here i am.
Never say Never or won't ever for a reason. As our lives change and evolve so do our attitudes and desires

Good point BassLady!! Some want to be alone, others have no choice cause of there actions!

Fishin' Dave · Post by **Fishin' Dave** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 2:36 pm

this thread belongs in the lounge. Please take it there.

This is a fishing site, for fishing discussion. Personal problems should be handled by Dr. Phil.

Back to fishing>

drew · Post by **drew** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 2:58 pm

I have also battled this problem. You have to be honest with yourself and come to terms with your situation before you can make the right decisions to net a long term solution. Are you neglecting your partner? Why do you fish as much as you do? Are you obsessing about fishing? Do you really want to be in a relationship? There are many questions one should ask their self before being closed minded, abusive or throwing away their relationship. Many times it is just neglect and money. How you handle the situation can have a big effect on the outcome.

I'm trying to improve the planning of my fishing adventures and tournaments. Better communication and more advanced notice so she will have time to plan for herself. Also if I plan to spend $300-500 to fish a tournament, I will also plan on allowing her to spend and equal amount for herself. BTW I'm looking for a better job if anyone needs a manufacturing engineer please PM me.

Good Luck.

Slippy · Post by **Slippy** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 3:37 pm

someone needs to get there corns cut off!

Greg_Cornish · Post by **Greg_Cornish** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 5:26 pm

Fishin' Dave wrote:this thread belongs in the lounge. Please take it there.

This is a fishing site, for fishing discussion. Personal problems should be handled by Dr. Phil.

Back to fishing>

Skip this thread?

Jenny · Post by **Jenny** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 7:46 pm

Personally, being a woman trying to get more involved in the sport, it can be intimidating.

I will never forget my 1st tournament at Oroville, March â€™02. The whole two hour drive up there I thought I was going to throw up. Intimidation? I was so nervous. Unlike the weather (light hail, light snow & rain) the guys were really nice and I survived.
This is my 5th season as Bobâ€™s tournament partner and itâ€™s been a great experience.
We have made some good friends, guys and gals. Thanks.
Just one thing tho guys, when you get your wife hooked on fishing thereâ€™s only one way youâ€™re gonna get a new team partner â€“ divorce.

getalife · Post by **getalife** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 7:59 pm

I can't believe how long this thread is! Fishin' Dave wrote "this thread belongs in the lounge" I disagree. This thread strikes at the heart of most of us on this forum who battle with this issue on a continual basis. I dont tell my wife what to do and she will not tell me what to do either. A real man takes care of the wife and family first, and then makes time to go fishing. I tell my wife when my tournaments are and she works around them. I have fished through kids birthdays, anniversarys, etc. She understands the commitment I have to the sport. Now, if I come home from a tournament and find some size 14 FILA's on the porch... I will know that I have overstepped my bounds.

Gator · Post by **Gator** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 8:52 pm

Well, you guys said it better than I did initially, I guess I was responding to the tone of the post. Yes, family comes first, period. Job second, hobbies third. Fishing takes a little more of a lead in the hobby department as it is also somewhat of a job (Westernbass work and supporting my sponsors).

What I was trying to spell out earlier is what has been elaborated on so eloquently. I do not TELL my wife what to do or not to do. I expect the same. I also support anything she wants to do, be it go to a concert, buy a freakin 4 dollar cup of Starbucks everyday (still don't get that, what the hell ever happened to COFFEE flavored coffee), trade in a paid off 04 4Runner because she doesn't like it, whatever. BTW, other than a 2 hour a day, 8 month a year job (not talkin about takin care of kids, that is full time for both of us), I provide all of the family income.

All I ask is that she understand that I must travel ALOT for my job, I love to fish and I love to hunt. That's it. Yes, it takes time away from the family but I need time for myself, just as she does. She doesn't fish, doesn't hunt and has only shown vague interest in being out on the boat. Hunting is out of the question as there are not showers and bathrooms in the middle of the wilderness.

Early on in our marriage, she told me what I could and could not do. I listened as I thought it was the right thing to do. It didn't take long for me to figure out it was wrong. It also didn't take long for her to figure out she had stepped over the line. Now, as I stated earlier, I fish and hunt when I want to. If there are family obligations, I work around them...but, if I am planning a long trip (like my 20 day trip to Florida in November, to see family and hunt), obligations get put aside. I tell the girls that I am going to miss some games or what have you but that is life.

I guess everybodies situation is different, but somewhat similar.........

tunaeater · Post by **tunaeater** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 9:29 pm

First off...if you cant put a family first in your life...dont get married...simple as that...second...women all BS aside want a man..not a boy ...someone who takes charge...someone thats a good provider and protector...I tell my wife ahead of time a week or so when I am going fishing...telling her last minute would be rude... as a husbund and father there are a number of responsiblitys as the head of the house and those should be taken care of first...but having to ask permission like some child asking his mother is pathetic...she will respect you more by just telling it how it is and planning thigs accordingly...I dont neglect my wife...I make sure to spend quality time with her...but I sure as hell will never ask permission from her if I can go fishing...If she dosnt like it she can leave....and if she really loves you she will respect the fact fishing is something you love and shouldnt have a problem with it...Men as a whole in this country have become so spineless...all jokes aside what kind of man should be afraid of a woman.. women respect men less now more than ever....bottem line is grow some balls

DeltaDan · Post by **DeltaDan** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 10:32 pm

Gator wrote: I guess everybodies situation is different, but somewhat similar.........

Gator Pawz ....... My rig is hooked up, gassed up, rigged up -- only thing missing is you and Natti Light.

Boat Floats at 0545-0550 depending if I wana shave tommorow.

Iffins' ya wana fish- be there or call and tell me you are on your way and will not venture to far away from Russo's.

Bring your gold clubs and your best game as well. Ya don't have to worry about a sleeping bag.... I got you covered for the next 7 day with meals !!!

Fish Chris · Post by **Fish Chris** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 11:11 pm

Said what I meant, and meant what I said.

But ya' know what's funny ? I'd be willing to bet that not even the people who give me garbage on this forum, would walk up to me in person, and start anything negative..... because the first thing I'd say would be (with the same smile you see in every one of my fish photos is

"How's it going ? So your into bass fishing ? That's cool ! Where do you fish ? etc, etc.

The point is, I know I'm really extreme in a lot of ways.... but above all else, I'm a really friendly guy who just loves / lives to fish. Of course any of you who know me, already know this.

Peace,
Fish

bassindon69 · Post by **bassindon69** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 7:46 am

I can't believe the people that say if she does not like it, she can leave. That does not say much for love does it? I did not get married to tell my wife if you don't like what I do you can leave. I married my wife to share my life with and her life with me. I also married my wife because I enjoy being with her. She is my best friend. I did my best to make fishing fun for her. Taking time to tie knots and show her over and over many things without getting upset. She does it all on her own now ,gets out her own tangles and back lashes and everything. She can be my partner in a tourney any day before anyone else. I would rather have a good time with my wife and make her feel more a part of my life then not. Chris, your ok in my book. You are single and happy, nothing wrong with that at all. But to marry a woman just to boss them and tell them what you are doing if they like it or not, maybe you too should just be like Chris also and save your self some drama.
I bet many of you treat, that boat better then your wife LOL!

Love your wife first and the rest comes easy.

Don.

Guy Kelley · Post by **Guy Kelley** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 8:23 am

bassindon69 wrote:I can't believe the people that say if she does not like it, she can leave. That does not say much for love does it? I did not get married to tell my wife if you don't like what I do you can leave. I married my wife to share my life with and her life with me. I also married my wife because I enjoy being with her. She is my best friend. I did my best to make fishing fun for her. Taking time to tie knots and show her over and over many things without getting upset. She does it all on her own now ,gets out her own tangles and back lashes and everything. She can be my partner in a tourney any day before anyone else. I would rather have a good time with my wife and make her feel more a part of my life then not. Chris, your ok in my book. You are single and happy, nothing wrong with that at all. But to marry a woman just to boss them and tell them what you are doing if they like it or not, maybe you too should just be like Chris also and save your self some drama.
I bet many of you treat, that boat better then your wife LOL!

Love your wife first and the rest comes easy.

Don.

Amen Don. if'n yer happy and alone with your life, at least be honest about it.
but to seek conpanunship from another and finding someone who is willing to share it with you in all of lifes ups and downs and sticks with you, thats a blessing too.

Greg_Cornish · Post by **Greg_Cornish** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 8:29 am

My wife is crazy about animals. She literally saves worms. She's nearly put me through the windshield when she sympathy braked the car when seeing a racoon run in front of an oncoming car a block from us. She yells when a lizard or snake crosses in front of us for me to slow down. She puts moths and insects outside. She's personally at her expense had 85 ferrel cats neutered and adopted, removing two colonies since we lived here in 1997. I know she would actually put us in jeopardy if forced to make a choice between hitting a deer or taking the ditch. Scarey.

I stepped off the boat in the harbor one day and took one last cast. I hooked a 10 inch bass through the eye. I asked her to get it off. She did, but not without calling me every name in the book and cussing like a sailor with "LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE TO THIS POOR FISH!" She yelled, "You are never fishing again when I'm on this boat!" I haven't either. But as long as she's not on the boat and I don't tell her war stories, she gets up at 4:00 a.m. and helps me get ready to go fishing and encourages me to go. Yes, she eats meat. Weird huh?

Fish Chris · Post by **Fish Chris** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 8:34 am

Thanks Don, and just one thing to add...

I think it's far better to be truthful with yourself. I think a lot of guys are married and have kids "who shouldn't be" !!! I agree that if a guy is married with children, "the family should always come first" !

Their are just a few guys like me, who know that family life is not for them "and actually pay attention to those feelings" and live their lives accordingly...... Then their are a whole bunch of guys who get married, divorced, allimony, child support, yada, yada.......

Yet their are always a few people who think "I'm crazy" ! {okay, in many respects, they are probably right.... just not about this

}

Fish

Fish Chris · Post by **Fish Chris** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 8:40 am

Hey Guy, I totally agree with you too. Although I have always said I'd never have kids, I'm not totally against marriage. It's just that for me personally, it would take one "very different kind of girl".... the kind I have never found, to make things any better for me than they already are.
But believe me, if that very different kind of girl did come along, I'd be stupid not to jump for her, as she must be an exeedingly rare one

Been happily single for 11 years.

Peace,
Fish

Steve · Post by **Steve** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 9:38 pm

Its funny, in the past year Ive come sooooo close to starting a thread just like this. I have so many things to say it would take me a book, which Im not gonna do here.

Im sorta at a point in my life where Ive really tried to balance my personal life and my disease called bass fishing and duck hunting. Ive searched for the perfect companion. I cant find it. And Im about ready to give up.

Im extremely close to adopting FishChris's way of life. Ive cycled through every type of female you can imagine, and Ive about had it. When I peel everything away, the things that truly make me happy are bass fishing and duck hunting. Yes, Ive identified that Im selfish with my time. Way I figured it, if I ever met a girl that when that alarm went off at 4 am that I was more happy to turn it off and cuddle up with her then going fishing or hunting, well then I found the one for me. That aint happened yet. Matter of fact, every female Ive ever been serious with was more of a distraction than a positive.

Don, you are one of the lucky ones. Johnny C, your concept of catch and release is dead on. I coined a phrase, and it works for me. Disposable companionship; I live my life by it. Life is too short, youve got to live each day to the fullest and most important be happy.

Now, I got get my gear ready for tomorrow, which my live in girlfriend has no idea Im going fishin, and when I get back Im gonna have hell to pay. But, if I stick a double d it will all be worth it

bruizer343 · Post by **bruizer343** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 9:46 pm

Fish Chris wrote:Hey Guy, I totally agree with you too. Although I have always said I'd never have kids, I'm not totally against marriage. It's just that for me personally, it would take one "very different kind of girl".... the kind I have never found, to make things any better for me than they already are.
But believe me, if that very different kind of girl did come along, I'd be stupid not to jump for her, as she must be an exeedingly rare one Been happily single for 11 years.

Peace,
Fish

Hollywood · Post by **Hollywood** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 10:39 pm

way to tell it how it is bones!

The first time we agree and it has nothing to do with fishing... I have read this thread and it sounds to me like your a bunch of Neanderthals..... Fricking cavemen... Unbelievable... Seems like you cant manage your OWN life so you have a women arround to controll to give your self value...

If your with the wrong person then be a man about it.. Dont treat her like crap over FISHING.... bunch of hooligans....

Brian · Post by **Brian** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 10:48 pm

Gator wrote:Well, you guys said it better than I did initially, I guess I was responding to the tone of the post. Yes, family comes first, period. Job second, hobbies third.....

Gator you have it all wrong. It goes Kids 1st, Job 2nd, Hunting dog 3rd, Wife comes in at number 4. Or you could throw hobbies in there at number 4 and move the wife down to 5th I guess.

Brian · Post by **Brian** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 11:13 pm

Bassbones wrote:Brian either
1 your so full of ****
2 your wife has NO SELF ESTEEM
3 Your so pathetic that your holding on the the only woman that will put up your a$$
4 your so full of ****........

You have it all wrong Bones. Women like A$$holes. They need that control and to be told what to do. That is why your single, you were just too nice.

Greg_Cornish · Post by **Greg_Cornish** » Sat Sep 15, 2007 7:33 am

Brian. I think you found his "on" button.

Brian · Post by **Brian** » Sat Sep 15, 2007 10:24 am

Greg_Cornish wrote:Brian. I think you found his "on" button.

Thats Ok Greg, I already have one kid in college. The other two are not far behind. So Bones if I made it this long I must be doing something right since I'm still married.

bassindon69 · Post by **bassindon69** » Sat Sep 15, 2007 10:36 am

Don't be thinking we are friends now Bones LOL!!!

Don.

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